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Blogs > CeriosEros > The life & times of Zero Mega

Are men better a spotting assholes or are women willing to take the risk?  

CeriosEros 39M
615 posts
11/13/2017 9:27 pm

Last Read:
11/19/2017 1:38 am
Are men better a spotting assholes or are women willing to take the risk?

So I have this female friend who is breaking up with her husband of a year and a half because he cheated and they have only been a couple for 3 years. It's not the first time he cheated but he seems to be on his way out this time...Maybe. Here's the thing about this guy...He's a giant penis. Just a Huge Dick! He treats people like their beneath him and is verbally abusive to everyone and is so inflexible that if everything doesn't go exactly how he wants it when he wants it he will start a fight with anyone who is around. Either his wife or a waiter or a coworker. I've almost came to blows with him on two different occasions. But even back when we first met him and he was on his best behavior all of the ladies thought he was charming, handsome, a real catch. While all the guys had a weird feeling about him. Like something was off about him. And we told her to watch this dude but she ignored us and jumped head first in this relationship without a second thought.

I wonder if it's a lack of seeing the red flags or if women are hopeful that they can change a asshole into a devoted partner through the power of their love like a Disney movie (More on that subject in a different post...Spolier, Most Disney leading men are garage human beings). Or maybe it's a combination of the two. I have no idea what goes through the female brain. Or maybe it's a possibility that guy have a better radar for spotting assholes. Because every male you meet as a guy you size him up. Friend or Foe, If you can't read a guy you put up your defenses and and investigate and if he then gives you friendly signs you adjust. So guys have a huge backlog of data when it comes to judging other guys. So if a guy is giving of friend vibe but it's not adding up to all the experiences of friendly behavior from your backlog your defenses go up. Something's not adding up, I don't trust this guy. Or it just could be a dumb idea.

CeriosEros 39M
642 posts
11/13/2017 9:34 pm

 Not my best post but not my worst.


smartasswoman 66F  
35813 posts
11/14/2017 6:06 am

 You can be cool headed and rational when evaluating this guy because your thoughts aren't clouded by sexual attraction.

There's also the factor that guys like this do tend to be on their best behavior initially, at least for long enough to get the lady into bed. If they have good sex, then the oxytocin kicks in (google 'oxytocin the love hormone' and then she's hooked.

Once he starts to show his true colors - well, then I think it's the paradox of not wanting to abandon something that you've already invested in. She's relatively early in the game though, having three years with this guy. If he's as much of a jerk as you're describing it's good that she's exiting now instead of trying to work things out for another ten years.


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